Capital Enhancement Group

Random Acts of Kindness

Acts of kindness or service…. That’s easy. My husband had shoulder surgery yesterday and is unable to lift his left arm for 3 months. (he is left handed) Just getting dressed made him nauseous, and yes I will have to help him shower, dress, prepare all his meals, administer medication, get him as comfortable as possible in bed and just be there because it hurts. Now, in no way am I complaining or comparing with your challenges but I think it qualifies for the service you were asking for.

"How's about a really random Good Samaritan act of kindness for you? My neighbors next door are in wheelchairs in an assisted living home. One of their caregivers had a problem with her car door which had an easy fix if you knew the trick. She didn't, and was out there with a kitchen knife trying to get the locking mechanism, that was in a jammed down position, to go back up so she could close her car door. Ran out, showed her the trick to get this unjammed, got this massive hug from this person I had just barely met for saving her from calling AAA, and went back inside with a smile on my face. Hi-Ho Silver, Away!"

Ray, you wanted to know about acts of kindness, so here goes. Get up at 5:30am leave home at6:30am to take [ my grandson] to high school. He likes to be there before 7:00am, home by 7:15am. I do this 5 days a week during school year, if his father isn't home. At 10:00am took [my son’s wife]to appointment downtown. She's not real comfortable driving downtown, home at 11:45am. Took [-----] and her husband out to eat tonight. She's my youngest daughter who looks after me. they take me out to eat a lot.

After spending some time thinking about your request last week, I remembered something that I should have done in March—but didn’t.

Last term, I had a student who lost his job, suffered a physical injury, and struggled with thoughts of suicide. He is also a husband and a father. He had just returned to college after being out for years. I know these things because as part of the curriculum, we discuss ways to maintain our physical and mental health. His application for financial aid for spring term was denied. He appealed and the registrar’s office denied the appeal based on his grades from many years ago. I found out about it when I overheard a discussion about how unfair it seemed. (I hope this is vague enough to not be a FERPA violation.)

He didn’t drop his classes and was immediately charged late fees on top of his original bill. They finally worked out an arrangement which allowed him to stay in school for this term and to pay a small amount on his account each month. It will take him forever to pay it off this way. I considered making an anonymous payment when I first heard about his situation and thought he would not be able to attend spring term. Then, when I heard that he had worked out a deal, I selfishly talked myself out of it.

When I got your "Anita Update", I decided that this is what I would do for the two of you. It isn’t much, but it probably wouldn’t have happened without your request. I went in Friday and did what I felt I could to reduce his bill. He will still have to make his payments this summer, but at least he will see the end before fall term begins and perhaps by then he will qualify for financial aid. I have checked on his progress this term and he seems to be doing well in his classes.

You asked to know how we felt. Well, that’s hard to explain. I feel grateful to you for giving me the nudge to do what I should have done in the first place. It needed to happen. I feel slightly ashamed that I talked myself out of it when I felt the initial urge to help. It does make me smile when I think of him going in to make his May payment and finding a smaller balance than he is expecting. Thank you.

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An Open Invitation

Many of you have asked if there was anything at all that you could do for us. I have thought about this for some weeks, and there is something I would like to ask. Would you be so kind to do something in the next week to be of some sort of service to someone - regardless of what it is, or for whom - and then send us an e-mail of what you did and how you felt, with whatever particulars you may feel comfortable sharing?

The obvious arithmetic of this will be at least 500+ random (probably mostly spontaneous) acts of kindness in the next seven days. The "contagious" rippling effect of so doing could be in the thousands this week alone. The beginning of a weekly habit of such would total more than 25,000 individual acts of perhaps spontaneous "kindnesses" over the next year - all traced back to the request of the spouse of a cancer victim. While we can count the number of seeds in apple, we cannot count the number of apples in a seed.

I would also like to ask each of you who will yet send me such a story, if it is okay to take out any references to names (yours included) - and for the benefit of others, to expand their options of how to serve, post them on this "blog." If for whatever reason you do not want me to do so with yours, please send me an e-mail to that extent; no explanation will be necessary.

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